I am so blind, I did not not see
you standing right in front of me.
When you said that you loved me
I should have knew, that all I
wanted in this world was you.
You gave me everything, your
heart and devotion, All I did was
use you and play with your
emotions. You told me one
day that you would be gone.
I said yeah right, but I guess
I was wrong. I realized to late
how truly I love you, cause
your standing there with
him and just said I do.
You know what? I've been trying, but not able to concentrate on my work after I read bits from your blog and a friend of mine is getting mad at me for even reading you. However, I just can't hold back and stop myself from commenting. Your profile page shows you're 18. 18!! I can not even believe that. I'm elder to you by a handful of years and I know age is a wrong parameter to judge one's mental growth, still just for the sake of it, do pay heed to what I'm saying. Firstly, you need to know that you're a KID. Even I'm so at my age, how can you be not that at 18? Yours, like that of each of us, is a blessed soul. I don't know why or how could you fall in love at that tender age, and if whatever it is is love at all or not, however, let's not go into all that. I know every person will feel offended if we say whatever you feel/do is not love, but an obsession, and dear, I have no doubts about you. At your age, with the kind of understanding of things/knowledge you've, you believe in it completely that you love him and he's gone and you're in pain. However, I'm sure and hopeful that time will prove you wrong. I just can not digest that at the age of 18, when you should be loving life, loving its myriad of hues and colors, you're digging this sort of darkness. Kid, go out, look at the world, look at the flowers, stars, rains, guitar, music, your friends, your family (who must be the WORLD to you), love people, love everyone, not just that one guy. I mean how can one person become your entire world? When you were letting yourself fall into that love, did you not even think once what if he's not that "someone spcl", what if you're mistaking, I'm sure you must have given him all your soul/heart/dreams/laughters/everything. You must be overprotective about all these things. You shouldn't be so vulnerable. And here, I want you to know something.. you're so percious, you're so dear. Keep yourself safe and preserved. Keep yourself like your own child. Take care of yourself and believe in the power of true love. Wait for it, if it has to, it will itself find you. All that you have to do is stay unscathed, keep your heart flawless and believe in yourself, your soul, your heart. I don't know if it's possible or not, but I'm sure whtever is happening to you is bad. If you write out of pure imagination,/fiction (which I'm sure is not the case), even then you're hurting your childlike pure consciousness. And if you're actually going through all this (which seems more probable), then dear, don't do this to yourself. a HUG. Just look around. World is so amazingly beautiful with all those butterflies with their fluttering colorful wings.. just look at them for a while. Look at small children, new born babies, their innocence, charm, you'll feel life full of loveliness.
ReplyDeleteI know it's hard to stay off people and confine yourself within your self made boundaries. But first, you're a girl, and girls are a hundred times more sensitive and more beautiful than a guy, secondly, you seem to be so tender hearted (which is good) but which makes it vital that you take care of your heart/soul with a lot of caution. You're so blessed that you can feel love at that age. I think the only thing that's wrong is.. you're feeling it for wrong reasons/ in wrong ways. Don't confine yourself to someone at that age. Our hearts and souls are full of love and I know sometimes, in fact more often than not, we, as humans, crave to shower that love over someone, love is the truest nature of our souls, but dear, shower it not on one single person, but on everyone you come across. and also love yourself. Don't hurt yourself with blades and razors. I know at the end of the day, we're all made up of this bloody flesh and blood (now, this must be the way you feel about it, isnit it?) But it's your body, your skin, your lifeblood, don't do all this to it. Go for some nice long walk, look at the sky, people around, exchange smile with everyone you see. Trust me, even the most frowning people can't help smiling back if you look at them and pass a sweet smile:) Love to you. and i'm against all these ppl who actually say: yeah!! i can relate to it all etc etc. over here in your comments section.
Damn them, i mean... you're a little doll! and i'm sure you love dancing, don't you? I used to love it loads at 18. Dance. listen to sm lovely music. concentrate on your studies/work whatever you do. add joy to the world, not pain. you can delete this after you read it, but I really hope you get back to yourself soon, away from all these illusions/darkness. Love, lights and peace dear.